Crossing The Line [Andrew, Ceara] ((complete))

by **Ceara** Thu Mar 28, 2013 1:41 pm

Reporting back didn't take very long, just returning back to HQ to tell someone that the job was completed and they were on their way. It wasn't as if the cousins had had a very complicated or highly sensitive mission in the first place; standard grunt work, but someone had to do it. Ceara sighed and tugged Andrew along, wanting to get to her (warm) apartment as quickly as possible. The Guild headquarters weren't that far from her apartment, so it wasn't long before the girl was fumbling with cold stiffened fingers to insert the key into the door.

She grinned once the door finally was finally opened and nudged her cousin inside. "You're probably sleeping over, right?" Not that she would let him sleep outside in this weather anyway. "You can drop your stuff down in my room, I'll take the couch -" Ceara snorted at his face, already aware of what he was thinking, before he even opened his mouth. "Or you will, fine." She laughed and tugged off her jacket and gloves, disappearing to put them back in her room, before heading to the kitchen to pull out the cartons of leftovers. "You sure you're alright with just this? I can pull something together if you want."

by **Andrew** Fri Mar 29, 2013 12:33 pm

Andrew laughed softly at how impatient his cousin was to get back to her place, not that he could blame her since it was friggin' cold out here and he wasn't as used to staying outside during the winter as he had used to be between her and Aiden and Halt all insisting that he stay over (and probably worrying about where he stayed when he wasn't with them. He should do something to let them know that he rarely slept outside anymore) and also having temporarily been living with Robert.

While she was trying to open the door, he was bouncing on the balls of his feet and shifting his weight from one foot to the other while using his body to shield her from the wind as well as he could.

"Sure. It's warm in here and I don't want to walk six blocks to get to a Metro station," he agreed easily, slipping off his coat to drape over the back of one of the kitchen chairs. Her only answer when she suggested that she take the couch was a snort and eye roll. Even if that's where they started, as soon as he knew she was asleep, he'd move her into her room and take the couch. He'd done it before after all.

"Yeah, it's cool. Food is food and so long as it's warm, I'm happy," he said, getting both of them drinks before sitting at the table to watch her reheat everything.

by **Ceara** Sun Mar 31, 2013 3:12 am

She chuckled softly. "Alright, but if you ever want something, you know you can just ask." She busied herself for the next few minutes with reheating the leftover food, tossing the noodles into the microwave and dumping the fried rice in a skillet to refry. Within minutes she was finished, placing their meal on plates and setting them on the table before getting utensils and plates for themselves. She waved off her cousins attempts to help. Andrew wanted to help all the time and most of the time it wasn't needed, though the thought was appreciated.

Ceara was just a little bit ashamed to admit that she pretty much ignored her cousin for the next couple of minutes in favor of shoveling some of the food into her mouth just to get at least something in her stomach. Slowing down, she smiled sheepishly at Andrew before taking a large gulp of her drink. "What did you wanna talk to me about, Andrew?" Ceara hoped it wasn't too bad, though that was probably not the best bet, given the look on his face when he had brought it up before. What was probably a better hope was that she didn't go hounding after someone later. She was tired and the stiffness in her leg would make her cranky. Ceara spooned more rice onto her plate as he talked.

by **Andrew** Sun Mar 31, 2013 5:40 pm

He nodded. "Yeah, I know. Thanks though. You keep apple juice for me so I'm happy," he said with a laugh, sticking his tongue out at her.

Andrew didn't notice that she focused solely on her food since he was eating slowly to put off needing to talk just yet, so, even if he had noticed, he wouldn't have minded in the least. But, naturally the reprieve wasn't to last long.

He looked up at her when she spoke and finished his mouthful, chewing slowly. After he had swallowed, the redhead shifted nervously and wasted a little more time by drinking some of his juice.

Yeah, she was getting irritated so he couldn't put it off any longer. He looked down at his glass, turning it by small bits between his hands. "I... Part of why, well, most of why I lost contact for a couple of months is... I... had gotten a boyfriend." And that was the easy part. Now he just had to gather up the courage to tell her the rest. Especially since her opinion mattered so much to him and he didn't want to feel like he had let her down or disappointed her in any way.

by **Ceara** Tue Apr 02, 2013 12:39 am

She stared at him for a while, watching him waste as much time as he wanted. Her brow furrowed. If he was that worried about telling her, then it really must not be a good thing. Her cousin was never nervous. Or, well, he was a few times, but never to this extent. She sipped slowly at her drink, trying to remain patient but ultimately failing. “Andrew.”

"I... Part of why, well, most of why I lost contact for a couple of months is... I... had gotten a boyfriend."

…That was what he was worried about her knowing? That he hadn’t talked to her because he had a boyfriend? It was a relief though, to know that he hadn’t been simply ignoring her. She smiled slightly, picking up her fork again. “Really? That’s it? It’s great that you have a boyfriend.” His face, though, made her pause. The fork was set down. “…That’s not great.” Her smile melted into a frown. Was she really going to have to hunt down someone tonight? Ceara was still fuming, but her cousin’s quietness made her hesitate before she went to do something stupid. “..You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t wanna.” Didn’t mean she wasn’t still curious, but it was obviously causing Andrew some pain to talk about it.

by **Andrew** Thu Apr 04, 2013 1:07 pm

He looked down and away when she initially spoke but that didn't hide the uneasy look that crossed his face. "Well..."

He fidgeted some more then sighed. "No, I want to. I should. It's just..." He let out a frustrated breath. She was going to get mad and he still wasn't good about speaking up when he knew that was going to happen. At least, not when he wasn't already mad himself.

"I said that I had a boyfriend, not have. I... I broke up with him already. A couple of weeks ago, actually." He let go of the glass to run his hands through his hair, bowing his head as he did. His hands were left on the back of his neck in a vaguely defensive pose as he plucked up the nerve to finish. "Things... had been going good. Really good. I... I thought I was in love. No, I actually was, I just thought he loved me too. But... Well, he didn't. And... he hit me one time but claimed that he didn't mean to, that he was just stressed from work." He sighed, closing his eyes against the memories. "Then the slaps and stuff started happening more frequently and... One time he beat me so bad it was hard to move for a day or so. As soon as I could, I got out of there and broke up with him over the phone. I... I just went to a motel and hid in there for a week while I healed. And I've been spending the time since avoiding him and catching up with people."

And she probably hated him now; thought that he was weak or stupid or something like that for sticking with him and hoping that this hit would be the last.

by **Ceara** Fri Apr 05, 2013 12:51 am

Her only outward reaction to his words was a slightly harder grip on her spoon; otherwise Ceara kept her expression carefully blank, despite how furious she was getting at this guy for hurting her cousin. Yeah, she was definitely finding out who this guy was and where he lived eventually. Andrew had been in love with him, dammit, and this man beat him for it. At least her cousin had gotten out of it before he was permanently injured, though it didn't make her feel better that he had to be beaten to an inch of his life for him to take the initiative to leave.

But it still worried her that this was the first she heard of it. Why didn't Andrew at least call her to let her know about his boyfriend earlier? She promised that she would be there for him. A little frown crossed her face. She wasn't angry, but instead a little hurt that he didn't seem to trust her enough to help him. Ceara ran an agitated hand through her hair, knocking a few pins loose. She sighed and tugged them out, setting them down and playing with them for a few tense moments before she exhaled shakily. "Andrew..." her eyes lifted from the table to meet his. "Why... Why didn't you tell me? You should've called after he hit you the first time... I could've helped, Andrew."

by **Andrew** Sat Apr 06, 2013 1:13 pm

He chewed on his lip, dropping his gaze when their eyes met. It was stupid, and he knew it was stupid but... "I... I didn't want... To bother you. And... and I hoped, I told myself, that it was just the one time, that he wouldn't again, that it had been a bad day but he really did care for me."

Andrew lifted one hand to start lightly tugging at his necklace, playing with it in his nervousness. "I fell into the same mindset, trap, delusion, whatever you want to call it, that a lot of people who have been abused do - that it's going to get better, that it won't get worse. That the abuser actually did care. And he acted like it. He apologized and was gentle afterward and took care of me. I just... It took me a while to realize that he had isolated me, was keeping me in his apartment rather than taking me out and had hidden my phone. I haven't been in touch with anyone." He sighed softly. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

by **Ceara** Sun Apr 07, 2013 2:38 am

Her hands played with the ends of her hair, tugging and twirling them around her fingers, the speed picking up the more he talked. She wasn't going to pretend she understood what that felt like, but she was going to try and be as accepting as possible, no matter how much she wanted to be angry. Not at Andrew, but just... someone. Anyone. Her cousin didn't deserve to be treated like that.

Letting go of her hair, she reached across the small table to untangle his fingers from his necklace. "You don't have to say that. There's nothing to apologize for. I just... want you to trust me. Enough that you let me help you." Her hand dropped as she gave him a hesitant smile. "It's not your fault, alright? It never is. Just tell me. You're not a bother, Andrew. Now..." She paused, thinking of her wording. "Where does he live?" Because of she couldn't do anything while Andrew was with him, the least she could do now was make him regret every second he hurt him.

by **Andrew** Wed Apr 10, 2013 3:05 pm

Andrew twitched, stiffening a little at the gentle touch before he forced himself to relax again. She wasn't going to lash out and hit him for no reason. Of course, he really hoped that she wouldn't hit him even when she thought that there was reason to because what he needed right now was to be able to trust her, and he knew that it would be difficult if he was constantly flinching at every move she made.

But he couldn't say that without starting a fight and he definitely wanted to avoid that. She was upset enough as it was. Plus, telling someone not to do something wasn't quite the same as them deciding not to on their own.

"I do trust you," he protested, looking up at her in concern. The hesitant smile he was offering in response to hers vanished with her last question and he shook his head. "No, Ceara, there's no need to go near him," he protested. He had already gotten away from Robert after all, there was no reason to drag things out and dredge it all up again.

by **Ceara** Sun Apr 14, 2013 2:14 am

He did trust her, huh. She snorted softly, eyes turning downwards. It certainly didn't seem like that to her, to be honest. If he did, then Andrew would've told her about Robert as soon as they started dating. She shouldn't have to just find out about his ex now, a few weeks after they broke up. She really wanted to be there for him, but it was difficult if he didn't even allow her to help him.

"No, Ceara, there's no need to go near him."

She blinked and looked back up at him, brow furrowed. "But, Andrew..." She paused, breathing slowly to calm herself down. She wasn't angry at him, but why was her cousin stopping her? "Why... You didn't let me do anything before, so I just... want to do something, okay? I just need to..." She trailed off, her hand tightening into a fist. She just needed to do something, anything to stop feeling like she failed him and let this happen to him. She needed to help him. The unbearable frustration and self-blame was way too familiar for comfort. "Let me in, okay?"

by **Andrew** Thu Apr 18, 2013 1:51 pm

The red haired harbinger watched his cousin closely and, if he was being honest, a bit warily. His eyes dropped to her hand when he saw it ball up in the edge of his vision. He half-expected her to get up and clock him because he hadn't told her what was going on.

"I know you want to help, but at this point, it'll just cause more trouble, especially since he's a lawyer. I don't want to see you get arrested or sued or arrested because you were sued and couldn't pay for it. Please, it's just... easier to let it go." He gave her a soft smile and reached out to set his hand over her fist. "Thank you, though, for being concerned. It means a lot to me. And I promise, I'm going to get better about sharing things. I'm just... I worry that I seem too weak or like a burden to the people I care for so I don't want to add on to it. It's nothing personal, it's just me."

He really hoped that came across the way he wanted it to and didn't sound like he was randomly stringing together words into barely comprehensible sentences.

by **Ceara** Thu Apr 18, 2013 9:54 pm

Ceara tsked and shook her head, running her other hand through her hair. A lawyer, huh. Of course he would be a lawyer. Andrew was right, the risk of being sued or arrested wasn’t worth the satisfaction she would get out of beating the absolute shit out of Andrew’s ex-boyfriend. The knowledge didn’t make her happier at all, though. Her fist tightened, even though her lips smiled weakly. “Give me a little credit. I wouldn’t make it easy for him to mee my face.” She twitched slightly at the hand that closed over her fist. Ceara glanced up at him and, realizeing she was scaring him, relaxed her fist. She didn’t even do that consciously.

“I'm just... I worry that I seem too weak or like a burden to the people I care for so I don't want to add on to it. It's nothing personal, it's just me.”

“…Andrew…” Her voice was softer, her anger slightly cooled after what he said. Ceara turned her hand over, gripping his hand firmly. “The people you care about care just as much about you as you do about them and you will never be a burden to them, okay? You’re my friend, you’re family, and I love you.” She smiled a little wider and squeezed his hand again before pulling away. “I’m… I’m still angry, but at your ex… and myself because I can’t do anything about what happened. But not at you.” Her hand returned to her fork, poking around at her food before taking a bite.

by **Andrew** Mon Apr 22, 2013 4:29 am

He gave her a weak smile, clinging for as long as she let him. He didn't quite believe her but he wanted to, so badly. "I love you too," he echoed, smile strengthening a bit. "And that's why I don't want you to go after him. I don't want anyone to get in trouble because of me. I'd..." He sighed softly. "It'd be my fault and I'd hate to see that. Especially since you haven't been arrested and I don't want to see that happen anytime soon. Preferably not ever, but being in the Guild probably makes that easier said than done."

He put his hands in his lap when she pulled away, feeling a bit cold at the lack of contact. He wished he could just curl up next to her and cuddle on the couch. He loved physical affection so much, but she was angry and, no matter what she said, he was still worried that it was at him and he really didn't want to get hit, even if he deserved it.

"Don't be mad at yourself, please. It's not your fault that I don't want to tell you more about Robert." He winced a little. He knew he had to stop saying the older man's name, but the other had been so important to him, even for such a short time, that it was hard to not say at all.

by **Ceara** Tue Apr 23, 2013 1:16 am

"Probably, but I can take care of myself; it's not going to be easy to arrest me. Trust me on that." Ceara wasn't aware of her cousin's disappointment that she had pulled away. Andrew was usually the open book between the two of them and was usually willing to express what he wanted. She wasn't one to initiate physical contact often and it didn't help either that the other people she usually spent time with weren't very openly affectionate or even affectionate at all. She had no problem with it, but if Andrew wanted physical contact he was going to have to ask.

"Don't be mad at yourself, please. It's not your fault I don't want to tell you more about Robert."

Robert. It wasn't much to go on, Robert was a common name, but Ceara stored away the information anyway. Chances that she would find him were slim, but it couldn't hurt to try. "I'll stop being mad at myself when you stop blaming yourself for everything that happened. It's not your fault, Andrew." She smiled and slid the plate of noodles closer to him with her fork. "Now eat. You're still too damn skinny." Her lips curled up a little more to show that she was poking fun at him. Though he really was too thin to be healthy. She hoped that he was at least fed well when he was with that son of a bitch.

by **Andrew** Tue Apr 23, 2013 3:16 pm

He smiled lightly at her and shrugged. "Yeah, I do. But... I still worry. Just like how you worry about me," he said, smile growing a little. Or, he certainly hoped it was like she worried about him.

Smile fading again at what she said, he looked down at the food in front of him, lifting his own fork to play with the food, swirling the noodles around and moving them into abstract curved patterns that looked like eddies in water.

"I can try," he finally said after a couple minutes of silence. "I've just... Did I tell you that I got blamed for everything before getting kicked out? Jared failed a test? "Must be the freak's fault." Car broke down? "That monster did something to it." Sperm donor was skipped over for that promotion? "It's because they don't want to give the job to someone with a harbinger in the family." Nevermind that it could have been that he didn't study, or the part had been going out, or that it was his attitude." He sighed and took a bite of food, chewing half-heartedly.

by **Ceara** Fri Apr 26, 2013 12:00 am

She nodded and smiled slightly. Ceara couldn’t ask him to let her help him and worry about him without allowing him to do the same for her. Of course, she didn’t feel like he needed to worry about he, not was his concern entirely wanted, but she supposed that was what he felt like too. Neither of them wanted to be or feel like a burden to the other. She frowned when he fell silent and didn’t respond to her and returned to her food, finishing up the remains on her plate before Andrew spoke up again.

“I can try.”

Her brow furrowed as he continued and she shifted around in her seat, twisting a strand of hair around her finger. It was disgusting, that she was related to the assholes her cousin was describing. “Did you believe them?” she asked a few moments after he finished. “I know you didn’t actually do those things that they blamed you for, so did you believe them anyway?” She smiled slightly, reaching out to hold the hand holding his fork. “All they wanted was a scapegoat for their pathetic failures, Andrew. You know that. You might’ve grown up with people telling you that everything was your fault, but you know that’s not true. It wasn’t back then and it isn’t now.”

by **Andrew** Sat Apr 27, 2013 10:08 am

He stared at his food, listening to her ask if he believed what they said. Did he? He wasn't sure anymore. Yeah, like she was saying, he didn't do those things, couldn't have done most of them, but... He still heard them or variations of them every day for fifteen years. Something like that, it stuck with a person. So, even though he knew just as well as he was sitting here right now that he wasn't to blame for any of it, he still felt like he was.

Sighing softly, he moved his free hand to rest on hers, squeezing lightly in thanks. "Yeah, I know," he said softly, finally glancing up from his food to give her a weak smile, something that was a pale imitation of his normal expression. "But knowing something and believing it are two pretty different things, you know? You hear something enough, you start to think it's true, no matter how much there is to prove it wrong. And it's a lot easier to believe the bad stuff than it is the good."

Shrugging a bit, he patted her hand then moved his off of hers, taking the fork to eat a bit clumsily with his weaker hand, turning the other over to lightly hold her hand. "I'll be okay. Don't worry."

by **Ceara** Tue Apr 30, 2013 12:45 am

Ceara smiled and nodded. "No, I get it. You might know that it's wrong and you're not at fault, but if its repeated enough there's a part of you that starts to think that it is true." She couldn't say that she had experienced being told she was useless for years herself, but she could understand that feeling. That you were to blame for something that was entirely out of your control. That your presence was enough to cause pain and suffering to the people close to you. That was a feeling she was familiar with, and she knew it wasn't pleasant. And Andrew's situation could only be worse than hers.

"I'll be okay. Don't worry."

She stared at him for a few moments before tugging her hand away and standing. Her plate was placed in the sink and she moved over to him, pulling him close and setting her chin on the top of his head. "I know. And I will still worry about you, you can't stop me from doing that." She paused, then, "I love you, and don't forget that. I might say some stupid shit sometimes but people do that, and it doesn't change the fact that I still love you, mkay?" She smiled and pressed her lips to his temple. "Now finish the rest while I go take a shower. I'll leave some hot water for you." Ceara laughed softly and stepped away, absentmindedly heading to the bathroom.

She kept true to her promise and kept the shower short, not wanting to use too much water nor leave Andrew alone for too long. Ceara was in the middle of drying off and reaching for her clothes only to find that there were no clothes to put on. "...Shit. Hey, Andrew? Im stupid, can you grab me some sweats and a shirt? Second drawer."

by **Andrew** Fri May 03, 2013 3:21 pm

Andrew'd be lying if he said that any time that someone pulled away from him, from his hand or hugs or even the casual brush of arms and shoulders against one another as they walked, it didn't leave him cold or make him think that they wouldn't come back or that he'd never have that contact again. He'd also be lying if he said that it wasn't a pleasant surprise every time someone initiated contact with him.

He smiled softly, putting his hand on her arms. "Yeah. I worry about you too." He turned to her and smiled, eyes closing reflexively at her kiss. "I love you too."

Turning back to the food on his plate, it didn't take Andrew long to finish it. He had just placed his stuff in the sink and flopped on the couch when she called out. "Sure," he called back, hauling himself to his feet again and going to do as she had asked, digging around a bit absently. He should probably grab her some panties too, but that might get him hit for it. Not that that had ever stopped him from doing something before. It wasn't like she'd really hurt him.

by **Ceara** Mon May 06, 2013 3:51 pm

She could almost feel his hesitation through the door and smiled, knowing the reason for his pause. "It's fine, grab me underwear from the top drawer." Ceara swept her hair up, wringing out the water with a towel. She didn't realize her mistake, that some of the money she won from her fights was hidden in a small bag at the back of that drawer. Once she started to bring in quite a bit of money from the Arena, she had broken the stash up into smaller, though still sizable, stacks; keeping a wad of cash in one place was just asking for trouble.

The girl frowned when she caught sight of herself in the mirror, a mottled mess of colorful bruises around her neck and shoulders. It was lucky that she had been pretty well covered earlier; Andrew didn't need to see the half healed cuts and scrapes and bruises all over her skin. She sighed and draped her towel around her neck, making sure that all of her marks were covered by it. "Andrew?" she called out when she didn't hear him for a little bit.

by **Andrew** Tue May 07, 2013 3:38 pm

Letting out a soft sigh of relief, Andrew popped open the drawer and just plunged a hand in without looking. Permission or no, he really didn't much want to know about his cousin's underwear.

The problem with reaching blindly into anything is that you don't know what you're going to end up grabbing. In addition to the pair of panties, he snagged the bag on accident. And then his curiosity, his damned curiosity that kept getting him in trouble and he just didn't learn from, reared its head and he just had to look in it.

"Holy shit," he breathed, staring at the credits. How many rich guys had she picked the pockets of to get this much money? And why hadn't she said anything? She normally liked to rub it in that she was a better thief than he was.

Hearing her call his name jolted him from his surprise and he shoved the bag back, closing the drawer with a snap. Quickly grabbing her a pair of sweat pants and the first top he could (a shirt she had stolen from him that he had stolen from Halt), he carried the clothes out to her, lightly knocking on the bathroom door and holding them all in one hand, keeping his face turned away from the door.

by **Ceara** Thu May 09, 2013 12:46 am

"Thanks." She stuck her hand out, reaching blindly for the clothes and tugged them into the room, closing the door quickly behind her. She made quick work of pulling in the clothes and was just about to open the door again when she hesitated.

Shit.

The shirt was huge on her, she was swimming in it, but even still the sleeves weren't enough to cover the bruises on her forearms. The ones higher up, she could just brush off as something she got from a fight and Andrew would probably believe her... But the fading purple marks around her wrists, those were a bit harder. She knew where they came from, and it was pretty evident that they were hand marks. She could only imagine what kinds of assumptions her cousin would make. Sighing, Ceara threw the towel around her neck again and reached for the handle. There was nothing she could do about it now; hopefully they were faded enough that he didn't notice, at least not when there were more prominent bruises higher up on her arm.

"Your turn," she said, opening the door and stepping to the side, moving towards her bedroom, trying to prevent him from looking at her for too long.

by **Andrew** Fri May 10, 2013 4:35 pm

Andrew turned to grin at Ceara when she stepped out. "Awesome. Thanks," he said, lifting a hand to tweak some of her hair, knowing that it aggravated her more times than it didn't.

His hand had dropped again and he was turning to slip into the bathroom when her appearance registered and he stopped, frowning as he thought that over. Had he really seen what he had thought he had seen?

"Ceara? Are you hurt?" he asked, turning slowly toward her, brow furrowed "What's that on your n-- What happened to your wrists?" was his next question as he stepped toward her and lifted one of her arms to peer closer. It was at that faded yellow with a hint of green stage of healing so she had had these for a while. So, why hadn't she said anything?

He met her eyes, concern clear in the green swirls. "Who grabbed you? Why? Are you okay?" If someone had tried to rape her, or god forbid, actually done so, he was going to kick something. Preferably the person who did it and in the throat.

by **Ceara** Sun May 12, 2013 1:33 am

She huffed and swatted at his hand, rolling her eyes at him as she reached for the door handle. "Ceara? Are you hurt?"

The girl flinched at his words, turning around slowly. Of course that wouldn't get past him. She was stupid for thinking it would. A small squeak of surprise left her, followed by a sharp hiss of pain when he suddenly grabbed one of her arms right where one of her bruises was, lifting it. "Ow, damn it, Andrew." Ceara removed his hand from her arm, massaging the area gently. "I just got into a fight. Fights," she amended, knowing that some of her bruises were older than the rest. Ceara purposefully ignored his almost question about the marks on her neck, because under those bruises were unmistakable hickies. "I know what you're thinking, and no, I didn't get raped. It's nothing Andrew." The half truths coming from her made her feel more than a twinge of guilt, but at least she wasn't outright lying to his face. She smiled and turned away from him, heading to her door again. "It's really nothing out of the ordinary, Andrew. It's fine."

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